Behavior Problems Characteristics

In a recent entry entitled child behavior problems, I introduced the concept of how behavior problem characteristics are covered in the first lesson of the Total Transformation Program.

In this entry, I want to explore one characteristic in more detail. It is listed in the course material as: Injustice. Author James Lehman explains that he means a child who constantly sees everything as unfair. Anyone who has spent five minutes with a kid knows that the phrase, “It’s not fair” is an ingrained part of every kid’s vocabulary. When looking at injustice as a behavior characteristic issue, it is a little more complicated. In this case, kids use their feelings that the world is not fair to justify their bad behavior. They decide erroneously that since rules aren’t fair, they should not have to follow them. (Does this hit home for a lot of adults who use the same rational when it comes to following, or not following, speed limit laws and other traffic laws?)

Another convenient consequence for kids is the use of “It’s not fair” as a way to put adults on the defensive during an argument and to refocus the discussion away from their own bad behavior of breaking a rule to a debate about whether the rule was fair in the first place. Parents and teachers, you know how often this happens to you!

My advice is never for one second get into a debate about the fairness of any rule. It doesn’t matter whether it is fair or not, the discussion must remain centered on the fact – the child has broken a rule that is an unacceptable behavior.

We’ll explore another bad behavior characteristic in the next entry in this series. If you already know that you could benefit from the parenting help in the course, then get this effective home discipline program today.

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